Whew!!! I thought I was losing my mojo, and actually I was just losing my mind! For those of you that are not at all into my metaphysical posts, I warn you now this is a weird one and I'd love to see you back tomorrow. For those of you who have encouraged me with these posts, thank you for reading on. As many of you know, I have said time and again, that my brain problems and my sixth sense are intermingled. That has been the case over the past couple of days which is what has kept me away from my computer; blessedly not the loss of my "blogging-mojo" ha!!
It always takes me a couple of days even to figure out what the heck is going on, and thanks to my Mom, I was finally able to put the pieces of the puzzle together. I guess I will start at the beginning for all of you. A little over a week ago I got concerned over what I would call my Iowa connection. Those are my relatives in Iowa that we just visited for Thanksgiving; I wasn't sure who to be concerned about, or if I should even be overly concerned. So, I e-mailed my cousin Joe, you know just checking in, etc. Then, lo and behold I had two other cousins from Iowa find me on the internet two days in a row. One is coming to visit us soon and the other was just playing around on the computer and googled us. So, my sixth sense told me that this was no longer just all coincidence.
As crazy as it sounds, I then started losing what I call my brain power. Loss of concentration, ability to find the proper words, it happens to all of us; but since I started having seizures and these off days, it is very bad for me sometimes (even bad enough to keep me from blogging and driving as much as possible), so anyway I knew something was up. It was not at all surprising when I got the call that Uncle Frank had died. He was one of my Grandma's favorite brothers. Grandma has had a tendency to drain my brain since the day she died, if she has something she needs to tell me. Don't get me wrong, I feel absolutely blessed to have any communication, but I sure wish it wasn't so draining!
Anyway, when Frank and Grandma were both alive, my Grandma was rather hard on his wife because she was kind of a spoiled gal, didn't work, spent too much, etc, in my Grandma's mind. All of which is the exact opposite of my very hard working, penny pinching Grandma. I also know that there were hard feelings over the wife's decision to put Frank in a nursing home, which of course there always are in such a difficult situation. Frank had Alzheimer's disease and his wife had passed away some months ago now, maybe even a year.
So, anyway, I have not been to a funeral since my Grandma's and am not big on funeral's anyway, so you can imagine the surprised look on my Mom's face when I asked about Frank's services. Mom and Dad had come to Nathan's band concert (which was great by the way!), and I needed to know what was bothering me so much about this whole situation. Well, come to find out, that although the family had chosen to not tell Frank about his wife's death, his condition had deteriorated rapidly from the day she had died. He had not eaten well from that day on and his will to live had just vanished. Mom was not sure of the dates, but at about the same time as I got concerned the week before about my Iowa connection he had taken a turn for the worse, and that was the end.
I still had the strong sense that I needed to go to the funeral, which again, in itself is quite unlike me. As I said, with a chug, chug, chugging brain it has come to me that my Grandma is wanting me to represent her at the funeral, and that she is sorry. I have to laugh as I type that, because that is definitely not the word that she would normally use. But, she does understand now, that Frank had exactly what he wanted in a wife, no matter what anybody else thought, and that is all any sister could hope for their brother, right?
Well, thank goodness I finally figured that out overnight and got it off my chest here on my blog. I woke up fresh and clear, with my brain power back, which is what always happens when I process whatever it is that is mucking up my sixth sense.
PS As I'm getting ready to hit the "Publish" button, but who do I get an e-mail from? My missing cousin Joe, from Iowa, of course! Lord, do I love how this universe works!
Saturday, March 6, 2010
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